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Review of Payoneer: NEVER USE PAYONEER!

Contractors and freelancers have to have some way to get paid. Thus, they use services such as Cash App, Payline, Stripe, and so on. They do...

Music, Lyrics, and Collaborations


I was very tempted to cut the song down to 1:20 and leave it at that, but I came up with another idea: a self-collab. That's when you pretend you're working with another artist, and you jump into the next verse with a different flow. I think maybe I got bored with the same flow after a while. Next! 

They're all old-school flows, BTW. They're just varied. To be honest, I can't even do a "new school" or "mumble" flow because I don't comprehend it at all. I can do a "lazy" or slowed delivery, but I still use comprehensible and complete sentences that actually mean something. 

That's one of the major differences between older Hip-Hip and a lot of the new stuff. We were lyricists, poets, prophets, and messengers first and performers second. Now it's all about the beat, flow(?), and crazy-ass autotune hyperdrive, but no one even knows what these people are saying half the time. 

What's scary is that no one cares anymore what the lyrics are. Someone could literally rap to them to jump off a bridge, and they'd be like, "Ya!" "Hate yourself and your people!" "Yo!" "Do drugs till you go into cardiac arrest!" "Chyeah!" "Jail is cool!" "Ay! "Treat all women like garbage!" "Ya!" "Transform into a snake!" "Yooo!"

Please help me understand. 

The lyrics matter because they're the part of the song that feeds your mind. Then your mind shapes your thoughts, and your thoughts shape your actions. Long story short, your soul will be garbage if you constantly dump trash into your mind. 

Music is a powerful element as well. I'm not saying it isn't. The beat and sound can affect your mood and such. But if you ignore the lyrics, you might get subliminal messages you don't even want. You don't have to understand what they're saying to absorb those messages, either. 

Music and lyrics put together can be a healing or damning combination. Marinate on that concept for a while. 

This is not to say that all of my songs were "positive." They certainly weren't, especially the older stuff I wrote when I was going through the worst emotional torment in creation. I'm no saint in artistry or real life. But I hate to see good music get faded out by nonsense and wickedness. 

At any rate, I will go back to the music box later to try to drop the end of my song. Then I'll see if I like it. If not, I'll go with the minute piece. The song is basically an intro to me as a mature artist. It would probably be a great first track to an entire album. 

I might be down for some collaborations, but I might not be. I have to really think about it. Collabs are cool, but then I run into problems sometimes when I want my stuff taken down, and someone else insists on repeatedly putting it back up there. That's why I prefer to work with me, myself, and I. Then, I have the legal grounds to get my attorney involved (my job connected me with one) if my rights are violated because no one else owns any aspect of those tracks. 

But when I do a collab, we are both listed as copyright owners (because I am honest when I file). So that other artist has rights, even though I might not like what he does with the material I wrote, performed, and arranged. It kind of turned me off to future collaborations. I worked with many artists in the past, like producers, beatmakers, rappers, singers, etc. Only one person behaved in an asinine way, but that was enough to turn me off from working with other people. I think I'm good unless the next "collaborator" comes at me with some cash and a contract for my time and work.    

Sometimes You're Just Done/ Jalapeno Chips

These chips are the very first certified gluten-free jalapeno chips that have that FIRE I like. They're good, too. Most jalapeno chips (all) have a tame taste or are punked down for those who can't handle the heat. No, these are actually hot, and they're good, and they don't have any gluten. I hope they keep stocking these up. 

I've been listening to the song all day to see if there's anything I feel like I need to change. I like it exactly the way it is, and I'm seriously considering pulling a Method Man/Redman and leaving it at 2:00 or even cutting it down to 1:38. I can totally do that if I want to. 

Sometimes, you're just done, and there's nothing more to say. Other times, you find more words and pizzazz after you go back into the music box. It just depends. I have one or two short songs that are only 2.5 minutes. Most of the stuff is at least three minutes long, though. 

We'll see. The cool thing about being unpaid, unsigned, and non-mainstream is that you can do whatever you want. You can write whatever message you want people to hear and be as genuine as you like. You can perform in whatever genre you choose instead of being confined to a certain limited box because of your skin color or the way you look or such. I love Hip-Hip and R&B, but I also love Rock, Pop, Alternative, and so on. I like having the freedom to choose whatever I want.

You can arrange a song any way you like. You can make it 27 seconds long or eight minutes long if you want to. You can spit one long verse and no chorus, four choruses and no verses, or you can do a traditional arrangement. It's yours. 

You get the picture. There are no assigned personas. There are no agendas. No deadlines or pressure or anything. You get to just enjoy creating music. Of course, there probably won't be much money in it that way, but that's okay. I am an artist, so I enjoy my work, even if not a single person is listening or buying. 

Not sure how the new project is going to end up. Maybe it's meant to be short. Maybe I'm done. I won't be able to tell until tonight. 

Yes, the Music Inspired Me to Make Music


I spent about eight hours in my music box and stopped just now. I just couldn't do anymore. My brain was tired. I wanted to finish everything tonight, but that just doesn't work. It's never a good idea to rush a song because then it won't be the best it can possibly be. I did that a lot in the distant past and got a lot of songs that could have been much, much better. 

This one is fire, and if I'm saying my own song is fire, it is fire, at least to me. I am the cruelest, coldest, and worst critic of my own stuff. So if I like something, that means it sounds like something I'd seriously want to listen to. 

It is old-school Hip-Hop fire. It's not even the song I was originally working on. It's some new ish. Just came to me. I think people will like the flow. I'm definitely not any kind of old, washed up, or done with my music in any way. Yep. Old-school. I never adapted to the new "rap" movement and never will, lol. Eff 'em. 

I've been avoiding whole Hip-Hop songs lately because they're more work than other types of songs. So many words have to fit into three minutes of time. Like I said before, other genres are easier because you can stretch one word or phrase out for a very long time if you want to, haha. Can't really do that when you rap. 

Anyway, the first verse was fire. The chorus was fire. Then the second verse got corny. That's how I knew I was tired, and I needed to stop. I was like, "Yeah, no. Shut it down." I start saying whatever when I don't feel like making anything else up. No rush. I can go back in there tomorrow if the Lord is willing. I'm exhausted. Even if I did finish it, I would have had to do countless hours of vocal cleaning and mixing and so forth. To hell with all that. I'm going to bed.  I really pushed it. I only had a little bit of track left to cover, but like I said, so many words have to fit into that thang. 

The Next Morning

8:45: Listened to the song again when I first woke up to see if it was still fire. Sometimes, I listen to songs after I sleep on them, and I'm like, "What the hell????" Then I scrap them. It happens. 

Nope. Still fire. 

Song of the Week: Method Man and Redman's "Da Rockwilder"


We're going to go old-school with the song of the week this time. I've been watching "Wu-Tang: An American Saga" series lately and have been enjoying the backstory. In the last episode, they were all on a ferry ride trying to squash all their differences for the greater good of the music movement. It was difficult for RZA to make all that happen, but he had some help from his brother and one of his brother's best friends. 

A guy was playing the violin on the ferry, and I loved it! The violin is one of my favorite instruments. I use violins and cellos in my music whenever I can. Sadly, I can't play either of them for crap. I had better luck with the guitars and keyboards. I kept listening to that violin solo thinking, "Dang, that would go great in a Hip-Hop song!"

I found out later that the violin solo was from their song "Reunited." I had never heard Wu-Tang's Song "Reunited" before, so naturally, I had to listen to it. It's good, though it's explicit like most of their stuff is. I can't say that Wu-Tang Clan isn't a part of my history. It totally is, and I listened to them and liked them a lot. They had many members, but I always liked Clifford a.k.a Method Man the best. He had the perfect voice, and I thought his flow was killer. His voice and flow got better as he aged, too. ODB had good songs and bad songs. His flow was killer in songs like "Protect Ya Neck," but then he was a little too explicit and off the wall in some of his other songs for me. He was still a very talented artist who will never be forgotten. I think I liked Inspectah Deck, U-God, and some of the others, too, but Method Man was my main man. 

Listening to the "Reunited" instrumental makes me feel like droppin' some bars, LOL! It might have just inspired me to finish the new song I've been working on. Sometimes, all I need is a little inspiration from Hip-Hop artists to put me in the mood. I was using my own beat for the new song, but I stopped recording while I was in the middle of going back and forth to doctors and whatnot. It seems I have a few days to play around this week, and I might just do that.

I didn't choose "Reunited" as the song of the week, though I think you should listen to it just the hear that violin I'm talking about. I chose a song that Method Man did with Redman called "Da Rockwilder." This is probably one of the shortest songs in history, but every bit of it sounds good. It's the definition of a Hip-Hop song. I love Method Man's flow on this one. Redman is really good, too, though I'm not very familiar with him. They both got that s@xy NY and Jersey swag. Don't get me wrong. I love me some West Coast and Southern rappers, too. But nothing hits me like that NY/NJ swag. 

That beat was amazing, but it was the artists and their energy and flows that made the song addictive. This song always gets played numerous times in my car when I'm in old-school mode. It's a fun tune.

New Tea Product Trial: Yogi Detox

I'm not one who likes to try new medications and such. I read all the pharmacist's paperwork, perform extensive research, and read every last active and inactive ingredient before I even consider taking something. Sometimes, I choose to take a medication a doctor gives me, and sometimes I don't. Had I taken the prednisolone I was given a long time ago, I may have improved sooner because it would have slowed down my immune system. Maybe I would have gotten a little better in one month instead of six months or fully recovered in six months instead of three years, lol. But I was scared to take it because some people had complained about weight gain. I was already 30 pounds past my weight with crushing chest pain from severe edema. I wasn't sure if taking a new medication would make things better or worse. I couldn't afford to get any worse at that time. I still don't know if that would have helped because I've never taken it. Still got the original scrip right here, as a matter of fact. I keep it as a part of my "lifetime box" documentation.  

I still wouldn't have figured out that gluten was the problem for a long time, though, and maybe doctors wouldn't have figured it out, either. It's not something that's obvious to people unless they know they have issues with foods or food ingredients (I didn't). Then they might think, "Oh, I wonder if I'm reacting to something I'm eating." It's not obvious to doctors either, especially when the patient doesn't see them much. It's not likely that a doctor will figure out that you have a problem with gluten the first time you see him or her. So I don't fault anyone for not knowing what caused the problem I was having back then. I fault some people for the way they handled the situation, though. 

I fault dishonesty and greed. I fault lack of empathy. I fault carelessness and laziness. I fault ignoring test results. I fault failure to properly assess and diagnose. I fault making up stuff (anxiety, impossible pregnancy, etc.) just for the hell of it. I fault throwing someone out of a medical institution when they clearly need lifesaving medical services. Temporary dialysis would have been nice, guys. 

That was the most frightening and lonely experience I've ever had in my life, and it still brings tears to my eyes when I think about how cold that was and how close I was to signing off. My trust is shot. But I also thank the Lord for pulling me through and giving me "signs" about how I could help myself. Thank goodness HE has the final say about how long I stay on this Earth and not another human being. I'd be screwed otherwise. 

I looked at my old videos and just noticed that I said  "I ate a bowl of oatmeal" one morning. In that video, I was complaining about the pitting edema and how I "didn't have it when I first woke up but had it then." When I looked back at the video, I said to myself, "Oh! I guess it was the oatmeal!" Some gluten-sensitive people have issues with oats. I'm one of those people. I even have issues with the "gluten-free" oats, so I avoid those too now. 

A New Tea Product Trial: Yogi Detox

I'll give a food or drink product a chance if it doesn't have any gluten or known allergens in it. Right now, I'm still in the stage of figuring out what I can and can't eat or drink. I'm looking at how my stomach responds as well as what my energy level looks like about 20 to 30 minutes after I eat or drink. I'm still judging which intolerances I still have as well. The lactose intolerance seems to be getting much better, but I still have some issues if I don't use my digestive enzymes before I have it. My stomach still doesn't care for too much fructose. I still get a little bit of bloat from that, but my energy doesn't zap out or anything. 

I tried this new tea to see if I could maximize my kidney/liver/pancreas health. I switch between probiotics, digestive enzymes, and having this tea from time to time. The tea has a lot of elements in it that boost bile production and things like that. It's a cleansing tea, meaning that anyone who drinks it will probably spend some time in the little girl's or boy's room. There's no caffeine in it, no gluten, and no other harmful ingredients. As long as you're not allergic to any of the herbs, you're good! 

It tastes pretty good. I put a little bit of gluten-free and lactose-free cream in it just for a bit of a sugar taste. I usually have one cup, but not every day. It's good for bloating and getting things moving. I give it a thumbs up. 

I am still 121 pounds, and I still feel very energetic, though I'm stressed over some recent worldly developments. Anyone in my situation would be.