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"Dear Wounded" Song From 2010

Today I'd like to share a song I wrote in 2010. I was collaborating with a band named Smashcan at the time, and they were sincerely cons...

A New Day

I remained quiet for the latter part of yesterday. A life-changing event occurred, and I felt that it was just time for quiet mourning and resting. I 'll never understand how some people celebrate when these events occur. I didn't think this type of event was anything to celebrate, but then again, I'm a sentimental gal. Many folks from this generation don't appreciate that quality. All emotions are either weak, weird, or "crazy" to some folks. I'll never change, though. I do like who I am in that aspect, and I'm glad that no one was ever able to completely kill that part of me. 

I am still waiting for the new MAP sensor and vacuum harness to come in so that I can put it on the car and fire her up again. I'm pretty confident that it will be ready to drive after that. I hope I can stop paying Uber soon because it's killing me. 

Today, I woke up with a headache, and I thought I'd take a walk to get some exercise and see if I could get any of this weight off. I didn't have a good experience. Just walking from home to the post office put me out of breath, made me cough this wheezy cough, and made my legs get the pitting edema

Everyone asked me if I was okay and if they could call somebody. I said no, and then I immediately called and started trying to get into the medical office in the next town. It just so happened that they worked it out for me so I will be able to see someone soon. Hopefully, they'll look farther into my symptoms than a first-sight judgment or preconceived notion, and they'll help me find out what's really going on. I can't speculate. I can only say what the group of symptoms point to. I already did that. The only thing that can be ruled out is pregnancy. I told them I was in no possible way pregnant, and now they should have the formal proof of such.  Can we move on, please?

The list of other possibilities is extensive and none of them are good. They're all like ___ failure or chronic ___ failure or ____ disease or hypo __. Nothing on that list is something I'd be okay with having. There's a slight possibility that it has something to do with perimenopause maybe, just because of my age. Perhaps it could be hormonal, but that wouldn't explain coughing and all these complications every time I do an activity. I don't know, which is why I need help from doctors who can have labs run the appropriate tests. It doesn't look like it's going away. 

So after the post office, I took a rest and then walked back very slowly. My left arm was hurting by the time I got back, and my hand was a bit swollen, too. I took pictures of my hands and the pitting edema on my leg, but unfortunately, I couldn't take proof of breathlessness, a headache, fatigue, or coughing unless I did it on purpose. Otherwise, I couldn't get the video camera working in time. I want to spare you from having to look at my medical pictures unless you want to. I'm keeping all of my documentation in this post so that it will be all in one place if anyone needs to reference it. You'll have to click here to see it. It'll pop up in a new window, I think. 

So it looks like the latest chapter of my life, the newest season, has started with some challenges, but they all do, don't they? Spiritually, I feel amazing. My body, not so much, lol, but I'd rather be okay in the spirit than okay in the flesh if I had to choose between the two.

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