You can and should hold yourself accountable for your poor judgment calls, actions, and decisions, but you do not have to own anything that isn't your doing.
You do not have to take on more than your part in any bad situation, and you do not have to agree with others who try to force-feed the blame to you, either. That, too, is a choice you can make. You can refuse to eat a platter of self-blame you make for yourself, and you can refuse to eat one that someone else sends to you as a parting gift. Simply disagree with consuming it.
"No, thank you. I disagree. It was not all my fault. I didn't 'do it to myself,' since I wasn't the only one present or involved. I had no control over someone else's choices, behaviors, and actions. I was only responsible for mine."
The entire world can tell you everything was your fault, but that doesn't mean you have to agree with it. There's nothing anyone can do to make you take that into your soul and allow it to wreak havoc if you reject it.
Most situations involve more than one person and more than one perspective. Allow others to have their perspective, but don't allow anyone to blameshift you into self-flagellation. Forgive yourself and ask forgiveness for whatever caused the blame issue and then speed on with the faith that you are forgiven.